Friend of a Friend
by Nausheen Husain
I've always been confused as to what to put in the little box on my Facebook profile page that is labeled Religious Views. It could mean so many things. Are they asking about my views on religion, or what religion I follow, or what religion I would like to follow, or my views on the religion I do follow? Thinking about this one day, I was browsing through my friends' profiles while specifically paying attention to their religious views. Most of them had labels like Muslim, or Roman Catholic, or the Yankees. But one of them had typed in "friend of a Friend."
I assumed "Friend" was a reference to God and the person felt that his/her relationship with Him was like the relationship someone would have with a friend. Suddenly, an image of a teenager on his cell phone popped into my head. On the other end was an old man with a white beard, someone who looked like Gandalf from Lord of the Rings, or Dumbledore from Harry Potter. He even had a wizard's hat and wise-looking spectacles.
And in the middle of my popular fiction images, I thought of a quote by the eminent Muslim scholar and Sufi, Abd al- Ghani: "How can He be He who is sufficient unto Himself, Since I assist Him and come to His help? Then it is God who causes me to exist, But by knowing Him, I in turn cause Him to exist."
The first time I heard this, I thought, 'Wow, this guy has guts.' His claim to making God exist almost sounded hubristic, coming to God's aid. The Dumbledore-like figure in my image became the one talking, asking the teenager for advice.
As ridiculous as the image seems, it clicked with me. It's kind of like the difference between talking to your parents everyday about everything (as difficult as this may seem), and only going to them when you need some cash. The feeling of being created and recognizing the Creator actually makes this a two-way relationship, which is the definition of being spiritual. After all, a fictional portrayal of Jesus once said, "Submission is not about authority and it is not about obedience; it is all about relationships of love and respect. In fact, we are submitted to you in the same way [you are submitted to us]."
The quote is from The Shack, a novel about a man who visits the Trinity in the same shack where his youngest daughter was brutally murdered. The novel, by Paul Young, encompasses the "friend of a Friend" philosophy; more importantly, the philosophy is encouraged by the Trinity. By the way, the Trinity consists of an African-American woman named Elousia (but she goes by Papa), a Jewish carpenter, and an Asian woman named Sarayu who keeps the garden. Collectively, they make God, which surprised me as much as it did Mack, the main character. But Elousia cleared it up for the both of us right off the bat: "To reveal myself to you as a very large, white grandfather figure with flowing beard, like Gandalf, would simply reinforce your religious stereotypes, and this weekend is not about reinforcing your religious stereotypes."
This anti-institution story has been taken off the shelves of some Christian bookstores, but it is a New York Times bestseller. I sincerely hope that all kinds of people will read this book because it shows a much-needed face of God, one without expectations or punishments, without rituals or traditions. It makes you think that if God had a facebook, his religious views section would say "Friend of a friend."
